Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Cars+Michele=Mess

Here's ridiculous story number 2 (actually, a couple of stories that all involve cars). You see, cars and I have a checkered past.

I think my issues with cars started when I was only about 2, and stuck my head out the window to wave good bye to my Grandma. My mom rolled up the window, while my head was still out. The funny thing...is that we didn't have automatic windows...so, how in the world could this happen? Maybe this story is more of a picture of an issue with my mom as opposed to cars.

My hate affair with cars continued until I was 15 3/4 and got my learners permit. Only 2 days after I got my permit, my dad let me drive to church. I backed the van out of the driveway, and backed directly into the truck. Yup...I managed to not only crash one car, but 2! Genius.

College posed some interested car challenges for me. I won't mention the multiple times the I got my 1982 Monte Carlo stuck in the snow. Instead, I'll talk about the time that I blew up my car. During my 3rd year, my friend and I went shopping to get supplies for a toga party. As I came out of Target, an older man told me that my car was leaking anti-freeze...or radiator fluid...or some other liquid. He told me that I should be able to make it back to campus, but would need to get it fixed. Well, as I turned onto campus, my car stalled. I pulled over, and noticed little fireballs dripping from under my car. I made a stupid decision to open the hood, and flames shot out. I grabbed a water bottle (with about 4 ozs of water in it) to try and put it out. I realized it wasn't going to help, and started backing away from the car with my friend...just as the front tire exploded. I grabbed my friend and yelled "hit the ground"! I pushed the two of us into the muddiest ditch. We were covered in mud and my car was on fire. Luckily, someone stopped to help us, and we made it home safe. The toga supplies were lost in the fire, and my once red Dodger turned black...not cool.

Or...there was the time that I left my car running with the keys locked inside during a 3 hour class....in downtown Grand Rapids...stupid.

There was also the time that I got a flat tire in Lansing, and as opposed to just throwing away the blown tire, I also tossed the wheel to the tire. That was a costly lesson.

How about the time that I got hit my a car in grad school..by one of my residents. I had toOr crawl off the road, because I thought she was going to finish me off.

I also screamed and thought someone was stealing my car, all because I left my lights on, and saw the fog lights on. I thought someone was backing out of the parking spot (at Michaels of all places) and threw myself behind the car and yelled "stop, don't steal my car". I saw that no one was in the car, and slinked over to the driver's side..but not before a woman shooed her daughter away from me, and I heard her say "don't look at her, she's a little crazy."

Any stupid car stories that you can share?

4 comments:

JessLitLvr said...

I laughed for I don't know how long when I read this, Michele. In fact, I'm still laughing! I even knew most of these stories, but they still struck me as hilarious! Especially the one when Mom rolloed the window up on your head...

tania said...

I can't stop laughing! Particularly over the one where someone was "stealing" your car from Michael's and the woman who witnessed your desperate attempt to save your car told her daughter you were crazy...

Willo said...

That Michaels story is hilarious! Well, there was that time I hit a Red Cross van in the Eicher/LeFevre lot and it was considered a highway accident and I had to go get the ticket revoked.

Missy D said...

You are crazy! and I love you for it! I needed a good laugh today, so of course I went to your blog!! Keep it up!!